A lot of people stop at the physical side, because that’s what they’re used to with porn or something by themselves. IMVU is more than porn. Yes it’s a little less then real sex but if you really get into it it’s only a very little less. It can also create something that you don’t necessarily have in real sex after a while, that’s the emotional head over heels heart wrenching passion of falling deeply in love. You probably had it at least once in real life but in reality it doesn’t last forever for most of us.
Sure I love my husband but I’m not head over heels in love with him like I was when we first met. That’s nothing against him or us it’s just life. Real life isn’t quite a fairytale fantasy all the time. But this kind of can be.
Some relationships only have the emotional side, and that can be great. Some only have the physical side. Some people live in and never get out of that stage. The real magic though in IMVU comes when you are able to combine both sides!
The heartfelt intimacy and connection makes the passion more powerful. And powerful passion leads to more intimacy and even more of a connection. Either one is great but the combination is ubber powerful!
The first most important thing is the attitude of wanting and trying to please your partner. When you put that first everything else tends to work out. The ones that don’t seem to be trying are the ones I remove or avoid. And even people that aren’t that great or are just ok can get better if they’re really trying and want to please the other person.
The second most important thing to do to be better at passion is to open up and really let your heart flow. You have to put yourself into your AVI and learn to feel and express even the details as much as possible. Use lots of adjectives and paint a vivid word picture of every little detail and action.
Sexiness comes from your mind and the words you use are more important in great passion then sexy poses, triggers or voice boxes or anything else. But that doesn’t mean that the other things don’t help or add to it. So set up and use sexy poses and dress sexy and use sexy music or sounds appropriately. Sex and great love here doesn’t come from those things but doing all of the smaller pieces right definitely adds to the quality and excitement.
There are a few other things you can do that can help you to do a better job that I don’t tell most people about. The best secret trick is to use Dragon Naturally Speaking or any voice program that allows you to talk instead of having to type. I don’t do this during regular chats, but in passion I like to be able to have my hands free so I can enjoy it and still do a good job making it fun and sexy for my partner.
I also use a couple other tricks that I don’t talk about as much. I use a program that helps in typing things, kind of like an auto correct. This allows you to expand a couple of letters into phrases or even whole sentences. I got a gaming keyboard that has a programmable macro keys. I even got a foot pedal so I can just tap the pedal instead of having to use the keyboard for a couple things.
I made a database of all of the best lines I used or could find. A little bit of preparation can help make it very powerful and a lot easier. Some of the macro programs can automate a lot of it. I don’t find that I use those type of macros or the prepared lines as much once I got good with Dragon, because I’m with the same people fairly frequently and I don’t want them to feel any of it is canned or less than less sincere. The point though is that you should try to find a few ways to shortcut and make it easier to do a good job.
One of the things that I do which not everybody does is music. If you search a little bit and work at it you can put together some very hot sexy IMVU music mixes that will add to the feeling of passion.
Make or even find a couple IMVU rooms that have fun themes and use them with some friends. A generic looking room, or even worse the default room is kind of a turn off. But a very sexy room that’s different and exciting will definitely make someone want to come back again and so will real powerful love! Follow up afterwards with a note or two, to stay on their mind, and don’t sound like you’re gonna come track them down, but let them know if you appreciate it.
Poly-Amorism means loving many. In our real lives everything works better and last longer and goes smoother when you have just one great love. But wait, that’s not true either. We all have lots of relationships and people that love us and we love in real life too. Some of them are mothers and sisters and relatives, coworkers or friends from church or your neighborhood… the list goes on. The key thing that you have to realize is that since you’re not actually having physical contact the consequences and seriousness of it aren’t the same in here and that’s part of the environment here more so than real life.
This is one of the major differences though with IMVU. First of all you don’t have the physical downside of multiple relationships. In real life it creates a health hazard and puts everyone at risk not to mention pregnancy, but here that isn’t a factor. Secondly, it’s geared towards anonymity and privacy so it’s very easy to see someone privately and confidentially, and to meet sexy strangers very easily too.
Those are both some of the reasons why multiple relationships here is not bad, but that doesn’t explain exactly why it’s so good and so prevalent here either. I think the very nature of this place is that it’s ultimately not real and isn’t designed to be a lifetime situation. It’s kind of like living in match.com or going to an adult Disney World and limiting yourself to just one ride.
Unlike real life where the goal is usually to build a long term if not lifetime relationship and commitment, in here people come here for the journey or for the moment, to feel that once in a life time magical passion of new love over and over again. This is their fantasy and many people’s idea of a fantasy is not necessarily a single monogamous thing. Don’t get me wrong, some people definitely do that but given different schedules and life situations, unlike real life, monogamy seems to go against the grain of IMVU.
It’s not you, and it’s important to realize that your actions here do not translate into real life attitudes. Enjoy the magic of IMVU and enjoy the powerful passion that seems to fill this fantasy world.
There’s a commercial out now for the iPad that I really love. It’s Robin Williams reading a verse about the meaning of life. It talks about law and medicine being nobel pursuits that are necessary for life, but what really counts is your passion. It equates life and all of society to a powerful poem that we all get to add our verse to. And it ends with a simple question. What will your verse be???
We don’t read and write poetry because it’s cute. We read and write poetry because we are members of the human race. And the human race is filled with passion. And medicine, law, business, engineering, these are noble pursuits and necessary to sustain life. But poetry, beauty, romance, love, these are what we stay alive for. To quote from Whitman, “O me! O life!… of the questions of these recurring; of the endless trains of the faithless… of cities filled with the foolish; what good amid these, O me, O life?” Answer. That you are here – that life exists, and identity; that the powerful play goes on and you may contribute a verse. That the powerful play goes on and you may contribute a verse. What will your verse be?
I think of IMVU as my passion and this as my verse and that’s why I try hard to do it right, to uplift everyone I can, and love with abandon. I let go and throw my heart into this and share my verse here. I work hard in life to survive but in some ways this may be my real verse.
Regardless of what your real life is of isn’t you have a unique and special verse to contribute and share here if you want to. Make it count and make a good one because in the end I think what we do here does matter and does count! Life isn’t just getting from point A to point B. Share your passion and make your life a beautiful contribution, and enjoy the journey!
This is one reason why I really like to see friends that I know already more than just random people which I don’t do as much anymore. It’s not that I don’t like meeting new people, I do. But it’s easier to connect and feel something more with someone you have been close to before then it is to start from scratch.
Conditioning could also be another explanation why each relationship tends to be even more exciting and fun than previous relationships, at least in general. I definitely think that’s why its also so easy to have a great time with someone you care about and why there’s a momentum to a relationship. Some people just seem to reach right into me and grab me by the heart, and I love that.
We get more and more conditioned to open our hearts and learn to let go more and more easily, the more good relationships you have and the more passionate things you share. On the other hand, if you have bad experiences, you tend to get more and more conditioned to have bad experiences. So it spirals and builds on itself. But it can work both ways. So don’t get jaded, find your own passion rut.
If you had a bad day or your partner did, push their buttons. If you feel distant or like something is missing, take them on a sexy adventure. Be bolder or more passionate or aggressive than you usually are. You might be surprised how much better everything feels when you kick it up a notch or two.
Oh and here’s another sexy secret. If you don’t usually push much, pushing and saying how much you need them is even more exciting. Whisper in their ear not just that you need them but graphically what you want to do to them. If you don’t usually do this, try it.
You can create the same feeling you get from having sex and get them super excited by describing it as if you were doing it under the guise of saying what you want or what you’re going to do to them. This is one of the sexiest forms of teasing. Try it next time you’re whispering!
Sure, I admit that I don’t always physically do what I describe, but I emotionally do. Real life gets in the way, and there are definitely times when I don’t have enough privacy and can’t. That’s just life. But I do it for the same reason I fake it sometimes in real life, because it’s important to please my partner, not just in a gratification way, but because of what it does for the relationship. There’s something about how we’re made that we not only need that love, but need to share and give it to someone we love.
My favorite position is usually one that I can see the other persons eyes, because I want to look deep into their eyes and into their soul as I feel that feeling of pure ecstasy. It’s important to make that connection. It makes me feel so close and wonderful and I want my partner to feel that too when they look at me. I want to hold on tight, because it’s not a porn movie and I kind of feel that same holding them even when it’s not sex. I like a finger (or something) in my mouth when I come, even if I can’t suck just because it makes me feel so sexy. And then grabbing his finger in the movies or in the car… well you know.
I’m not here to fake things, but I’m not just here for myself either. So sometimes it’s more important to love and please your partner, and express your love for them, than anything else. It’s great when you you really truly KNOW your partner here and feel their heart and soul and dedicate yourself to pleasing them. You know you’re in love when it’s not about having sex or orgasms as much as it’s about wanting to do anything to please the person you love, and feel that passion with you.
I wrote something like this about IMVU SEX Tips before so lets call this MORE sex tips. A few of these overlap but not too much, so if you like this check out the first post about IMVU Sex Tips. These are the things that no IMVU forum will tell you. Your parents or friends don’t tell you this stuff either, but this can help make your experience here much more rewarding. I don’t profess to be an expert in this but I have learned a lot in the past couple years. I’d like to think this is a decent collection of advice but many of you may have valuable things to add too. So please leave me comments!
It’s helpful to let your partner know when you’re getting close and when you come. They want to please you and want to respond appropriately. You also need to give them time to get there, to be ready. Also realize that a lot of people cum either before or after they say it. So don’t stop short, (unless someone is at your door!)
Sometimes with some people that seem more intimacy oriented, I do kind of stay a little quieter and don’t scream as much. But make sure your partner knows where you’re at. It’s kind of awkward to not know whether to keep going or cuddle. Some people I eventually have to ask. And it’s a great feeling knowing that you’ve pleased someone.
It’s ok to be quiet a little, but just remember that women are more verbal and often really need your encouragement. And if you aren’t making the other person feel sexy they’re not gonna want to see you again. There’s just too many people eager to please and it’s easy to avoid someone that wasn’t that great.
Be enthusiastic and make the orgasm last a little longer than it does in real life but not too crazy. If they’re not quiet there it gives them time and encouragement. And realize that a little bit of quiet time is also important and probably just means they’re enjoying it.
It’s good to be a little loud and overly enthusiastic but don’t be insane. I knew one girl that would fill 10+ bubbles with CUMMMMMMMMMMMM and it got to be kind of funny. I later concluded that there was a high probability that the person was too young although that wasn’t necessarily related.
Don’t try to keep them forever, but don’t run away too quickly, especially as soon as you come. It’s ok to say it’s hard to let them leave, but don’t whine. One person I know complains when I leave even if we’ve spent over two hours together and it’s like 5am, which just seems kind of unfair.
Write a note afterwards if it was good. You don’t have to be a great writer or spew poetry. But letting them know that you appreciated them is important. It’s not as important to send a gift as it is to say something nice and emotional.
I look at my invites and also look at my messages. If you usually just invite, try sending a cute or sexy message instead of just inviting. A message is nice because you can write something seductive, about craving them or needing them, or write a sexy situation.
Be flexible. Sometimes I want to keep going a little after wards, and want more but sometimes I can’t, which is often a function of time, and you have to feel them out. It’s helpful to mention your time limitations up front, especially if you have a hard deadline. And if they tell you they have a commitment, respect that.
I like to be seduced, and you don’t have to take the first no I can’t, if it’s not that definitive but you can’t just keep trying too hard all the time. If it’s a schedule thing like having to pick my kids up, seducing probably won’t help much. But if it’s just that I’m not in the mood or tired (unless it’s 430am or super late) sometimes it’s nice to be enticed.
Make it your goal for that person to want you desperately. I’m very married in here and super committed to my spouse, but when she’s not here and I’m with someone else, I love them enthusiastically and passionately. And I take it as flattery when they want me to be regular or committed to them. At that point I might back pedal politely but I do like being wanted.
You’re allowed to say things in passion. I used to be afraid to say I Love You, or strong things in passion even if I was moved to, because I was worried what they would think or how it would be taken. I give people more liberty in passion now and take some liberties then too. Don’t worry. That doesn’t mean I want to marry you or that you’re a stalker.
Don’t demand commitment, especially in passion. Make them WANT to commit, don’t require it, especially in the middle of passion. It can be a huge buzz kill and hurt the momentum of the passion much more than it will help anything.
When you’re rampping up, I find it helpful to describe what you’re gonna do, or what you want to do. There’s just nothing more exciting than being told that you’re gonna be taken, that you’re make me cum till I cry. Don’t talk like that if we’re not in the mood to begin with, but talking dirty is super hot if you’re at second base already or sometimes into heavy flirting.
Try to use a few poses. I admit that I’ve definitely had some mind blowing times without any poses, but that doesn’t mean they wouldn’t have been better if you’d had poses. Sexy poses do add to it, just like getting naked does. I don’t HAVE to get naked to feel sexy but I usually feel sexier when I’m naked. Don’t try to use every pose in the room, and don’t change poses right when the other person is about to cum.
T1 style (longer multi line role playing responses) is good for bigger stories and fighting, but it sucks at building momentum that’s kind of necessary for real passion. If you’re writing a sexy story use T1. If you’re trying to really create and represent breathless interaction, use shorter single bubble lines. Its also easier to read shorter lines when you’re getting into the throws of passion too.
There are some people that I’m a pure friend with. There are some people that it’s pure physical (OK I admit there’s more of these than pure friends, so shoot me). But the best relationships are usually a combination of both. That’s because friendship makes it more real and more meaningful. Passion releases powerful chemicals and powerful emotions that strengthen the friendship and open your heart.
It’s certainly possible to have a lot of passion without the relationships or friendship (especially if you’re a guy). But it’s still much better to combine both. You do get a little bit more drama with friends than you do with random people but that’s because you care and it becomes more real.
The strength of your friendship also helps make it all last. One of the benefits of a pure friendship is that real friends in here can be rarer and longer lasting than the typical relationships in here.
The sex though it can certainly be great, obviously isn’t real. But it can make very real and powerful emotions. So watch out because this rabbit hole is very deep, and very crazy and will be awesome but it can and often does get complicated.
It’s amazing how you can feel chemistry in such a limited interface so clearly. Maybe a little bit is hearing or feeling what we want to feel, but that doesn’t explain why some people really do feel so special and so amazing.
No matter what you think the reason is, you absolutely can’t deny that some hearts definitely seem to click. It doesn’t seem to require any specific characteristics, though I admit it helps to be attractive, experienced, and in some cases have a trigger. (I didn’t really say that last part)
The surprising thing to me is how often you can have amazing once in a lifetime type of experiences in here. I think some people have them even more than I do too. And some awesome friends even have them in real life too. But seriously I’ve never had so much fun or felt such intense and awesome things in my life. It’s not real life. In a lot of ways it’s so far beyond my real life, it isn’t funny. And you’ll never be able to explain it but I so hope you are able to experience it for yourself.