Posts tagged “meeting new people

Where do you start in IMVU

help getting started in IMVU

help getting started in IMVUIMVU will tell you how to log in, but where do go from there? If you have friends on here, start by looking to see which friends are online and where. It’s especially nice if you see some in a public room because you can go in and say hello more readily and can’t be declined.

If you don’t see any interesting friends to invite or go see, you can search for new people and invite people in IMVU directly (called Random Invites) but you’ll get a lot of rejection. I think a better way is to search chat rooms in a genre or theme you’re interested in. Chat rooms won’t reject you, and they tend to get you in front of better people than random invites.

meeting a group of friends makes this much more funYou may also find a close group of people that you like, that way. A group of IMVU friends is important and can be stronger and more fun than just individual connections and can lead to individual connections too. Being part of a group is also one of the best ways to get comfortable here and learn the basics is to find a group you enjoy and can feel a part of. Make sure you favorite the room because it’s easy to search just within your fav rooms to see if anyone is in your favorite rooms.

It’s fun to explore and meet new people but picking up where you left off with people you’ve already clicked with is usually much more fun. It helps if you can be consistent in your times online because you’ll meet people who are typically on that same time too which is nice.

Public rooms are not scary

big imvu guns

big imvu guns Ok some public rooms are scary or look scary. But going to public rooms is part of imvu. There’s a certain amount of fun and excitement not knowing what you’re gonna find as you open a new room. You’ll also find better quality of people than you do in random invites. I’ve met a lot of great people that way. Wendy also pointed out in a post that AP rooms have a higher quality of people because they’re less nooby. If you’re nervous go to the rooms that a friend is in, when you see it in their location.

If you don’t get a good vibe it’s easy to blink out. And you’ll have to go through a few that don’t click for every one you find one that does. Pick rooms that have an appealing description and/or picture. One good signs I look for are pictures of imvu people. People make the room and pictures are a sign of good people and relationships. The little touches can also be a good sign as well as a high star rating.

There are times when my best friends are all away or busy and it’s fun to explore new rooms and meet new people. It helps to have an interesting or cute line or two to open. It’s also good to explore rooms you have a good outfit for. Be respectful but have fun with it.

Imvu Invite Etiquette (part two)

imvu guide on meeting people in imvu rooms

imvu guide on meeting people in imvu rooms
I wrote a post about imvu inviting a while ago but had a few more things to add.

When you invite someone ask if they other are busy before you get to far into a conversation.

When the other person is getting very slow in responding then using short replies (and not because you’re in the heat of things) offer to get together later to give them an out if they’re busy.

When someone invites you try to at least say something in the decline field. It acknowledges them. The exception is a public room with people because they won’t see it anyway.

When you invite someone if they can’t accept or don’t reply send a note, even if it’s just to say, I just wanted to say HI! It increases the chance of being accepted and reinforces that feeling of wanting to talk with them.

If you’re doing random invites try to at least have something interesting to say or an interesting room or something in common or that you can comment on. You don’t call someone and not have something to say, especially someone you don’t know but might like to.

hot imvu chicks on the prowlIf someone declines you from a room it may keep declining anyone in that room so try to invite them outside of that room if you need to invite them again. Yes this can be very annoying.

If you crash early or in the middle of things and you’re not my best friend, if you don’t send a note I’m gonna be a lot harder to get a hold if in the future.

Listen to your heart

a friend I can talk to about anything

a friend I can talk to about anythingYou obviously can’t actually see the person behind the keys so you have to be more attuned to the feelings you get from them than you do in real life. You don’t have body language or as much else to go on in here. If the situation seems wrong, if someone is coming on too strong like they love you without knowing you, they might be someone you know, but with a different avi.

I think the inability to see them forces you to pay more attention and be more attune to the subtle attitudes and the little things that add up to a gut feeling. You essentially tend to develop a sense for people and you have to listen to that in here. I wear my heart on my sleeve sometimes too much but I also tend to have a good sense of people. I meet a lot of great friends but sometimes I do get a wrong feeling with someone and have to be able to walk away too. It’s not very often and this isn’t about anyone I’m friends with, but someone that I had to unfriend earlier today and I’m sure isn’t reading this.

I don’t know what the whole story was, but I had such a feeling afterwards that I just dodged a bullet. I’m here to have a good time and share that feeling with special friends but you do have to use and trust your judgment. This is a tricky thing to write and explain because it’s very hard to define. But just don’t get too caught up in things and ignore the sometimes quiet inner voice

Lock in new friends

building great friendships in imvu

building great friendships in imvuYou may not want to do this with everyone but when you meet someone important or special, it’s important to lock them in after you’re friended. Send them a personal note about meeting them or about something in their profile or homepage. Then if they write back invite them to a chat.

Its worth inviting them in the beginning because if you don’t know them enough to invite them now you won’t two weeks or two months later. It’s worth doing this because it’s easier to turn a new friend into a good friend than to turn people you don’t know into good friends. And it’s really the number of good friends that really counts not the number of total number of friends.

I think the trick here isn’t meeting new people but turning new friends into really good friends.

The Science of Making Friends

making imvu friends

making imvu friendsA recent article in the NY Times helped answer for me a question that Kait has posed here many times: why is IMVU so powerful? The article pointed out that it is really hard to make new friends after you leave school because psychologists have found that friendship depends on three things: “proximity; repeated, unplanned interactions; and a setting that encourages people to let their guard down and confide in each other,” All three of these are hard to come by once you graduate so we tend to have fewer and fewer friends as we get older, but that need to connect never goes away. But, proximity, unplanned interactions and letting down your guard, are three things that imvu is the perfect invention to provide.

No wonder this place feels like High School but without any teachers or anyone enforcing the rules.  I would also add shared emotions to the list.  And super attractive people and sexy clothes don’t hurt either.  Seriously this place does build the most amazing friendships and the most intense feelings of closeness.  The good news is that you don’t have to understand it really, but you do have to be a little careful.  It’s easy to get swept away, but it’s oh so yummy too.

Don’t be afraid to talk to people in tight groups

imvu groups of friends

imvu groups of friends Someone told me they didn’t like to go to public rooms because it seemed like the people were often very tight. I can relate because I’m very tight with several people and groups based in public rooms. But in reality those are actually the type of people you WANT to meet. The goal is to find a tight group that you like and feel comfortable with and be tight too.

People with good relationships are more likely to be open to and build more good relationships than people without relationships. You’ll also have more options and flexibility and fun being a part of a group than you will just one person.

I also think the best people in here tend to be well connected in groups. You won’t find the best people by randomly inviting or answering invites, The good people don’t randomly invite or answer random invites very often so if that’s all you’re doing you’re missing the best quality people. And people in groups also usually seem more open and inviting too. Be respectful and don’t rush in like a bull in a china shop but look for a good group, don’t avoid them.

Some Hearts just Fit

my best imvu friends and lovers

my best imvu friends and lovers

powerful imvu loveIt’s amazing how you can feel chemistry in such a limited interface so clearly. Maybe a little bit is hearing or feeling what we want to feel, but that doesn’t explain why some people really do feel so special and so amazing.

No matter what you think the reason is, you absolutely can’t deny that some hearts definitely seem to click. It doesn’t seem to require any specific characteristics, though I admit it helps to be attractive, experienced, and in some cases have a trigger. (I didn’t really say that last part)hot tub lovers

The surprising thing to me is how often you can have amazing once in a lifetime type of experiences in here. I think some people have them even more than I do too. And some awesome friends even have them in real life too. But seriously I’ve never had so much fun or felt such intense and awesome things in my life. It’s not real life. In a lot of ways it’s so far beyond my real life, it isn’t funny. And you’ll never be able to explain it but I so hope you are able to experience it for yourself.

Generosity goes hand in hand with Happiness

building strong imvu friendships

building strong imvu friendshipsGenerosity here doesn’t guarantee or buy you happiness. But generous people certainly tend to be happier. And happier people are definitely generous too. Be generous with the people you love.

Generocity can make a big impressionChristi was the one that honestly taught me the power of gifts and how effective that could be in making someone fall in love with you. I was in love, engaged actually. You have to be loving for sure, write great notes with them, and be there for them at the right time. But how else can you make some smile for the cost of a postage stamp. And if you add several smiles together with someone that comes here to feel sexy and have fun you’ll probably find that generosity does lead to happiness too.

I’m not sure if this as universal but at least for me I found that I can’t truly enjoy things here without helping other people to enjoy it too. Generosity doesn’t have to be with credits. I am spending a lot of time trying to make this a valuable resource because it makes me happy. We all have different ways of helping but however you do it, helping others leads to happiness, here and in real life too.

Loving my old Friends

Morgan is a great friend.

Loving my old imvu friend who came backYou’ll lose a few friends along the way in here. People misunderstand things or have situations, and things happen. If you’re here long enough someone will get upset at something you do or say, or something you don’t do or say. The only person that never upsets anyone is the person that does and says nothing. Try to do your best but also realize it’s how you handle situations that come up, that counts.

You still lose friends sometimes. There are some that I won’t ever get back which is probably for the best. But if you stick with it and continue to be a friend, sometimes things do come back around. I recently had two old friends come back in the same day. One of my best friends was fairly recently upset with me, but I tried to just be stay her friend and love her.

The other was from about a year ago, which is a long time for me since I’ve only been here a little over a year. She walked into a room and was a friend of a friend. At first I thought this couldn’t be the person I knew, but it was and we immediately picked it back up. The ironic part was that I had just unblocked her a couple days earlier when I blocked someone by mistake on my cell phone. There are a lot of people here but sometimes it’s a very small world too.

Anyway the point is that you can’t please or fix everything but if you stick with it and be a friend the good ones will come back.