Wow, super excited and nervous and anxious all at the same time. I’m worried about the size of the room and how many people can fit. So it’ll be important to have the link for JOINME readily available. If the link’s here it’s available. I’ll take it down when it’s not active any more.
Wow it was so wonderful!! Going to bed so happily married!!!
I’ve had a lot of amazing times here in IMVU, but last night was the most amazing nights of my life here! It was my four month anniversary with Kris and I knew she was doing something special for that, but she surprised me by asking me to marry her. It was soo magical, Fairy Flying, unbelievable flowers and the most romantic cuddles. I’ve never felt so close, so loved, and so unbelievably wonderful and so blessed.
Kris is not only the most loving, passionate person I think I’ve ever know, but she’s an awesome designer and developer and truly fun person and friend. Kris fits in with my family and friends even better than I do and is always such a blessing. She’s everything I could ever want. I Love you with all my heart Kris, and am sooo sooo glad to be able to tell the world how much you mean to me.
You’ve made the past four months since we met mind blowingly amazing. A picture’s worth a thousand words so I spent most of the day yesterday going back through thousands and thousands of pictures (is that the equivalent of millions of words) from just the past four months to pull out some of the most interesting or memorable pictures. I tried to keep this one mostly clean, (although it’s probably rated R), but I wanted to try and show people a little of the love and Our Story.
Sure it’s only symbolic and it doesn’t create any actual physical commitment. But a lot of things here are symbolic but it is still a very powerful thing and feeling. Before the wedding I was rereading my wedding tips and one line stuck with me. It’s as important as you make it. That is probably true of a lot of things in here but especially of marriage.
I’m proud and thrilled to be her partner and to commit myself to pleasing her. I was already putting her first, but there is something special about saying it in front everyone so clearly. It is the most amazing feeling to stand there in such a beautiful dress in front of her and all your family, crying and promising yourself.
I talked to a friend who has been dating the same person for a long time. She said her partner didn’t really want to be married and was happy as girlfriends. And I can appreciate that. I was so afraid to get married for a long time. And theres clearly no teal need to get married here. But even if they aren’t really ready for it or thinking about that, if you ask them in a good way that gives them the ability to quietly say, no they’re not ready yet, I think it can be a great thing for most relationships. Just make sure they understand that it’s not necessarily a yes or no thing but a yes or not now thing.
I honestly knew pretty quickly with Taylor that I wasn’t just close enough or in love enough to marry her, but that I was meant to be with her. I don’t mean to go on too much about her but I really do love her more than I can ever say. So bear with this newly wed a little.
PS. Thank you to everyone that sent even the shortest nice note. It means a lot and reminded me that the names and pics in your list are real people. That might sound dumb, but its easy to get used to seeing people and let them become invisible. And it reminded me that even if you get a chain letter type message, or just an announcement type thing, write back just to say hi. Being in contact and on their list and messages is worth it.
Wow, I just proposed and got proposed to by Taylor. It was so amazing. I sit here with my head just spinning. (Yes more than usual! Way more!!) I’ve had the most magical two months. It feels funny to say it’s two months, because it feels like I’ve known Taylor forever. And well if I haven’t known her forever, I know that I will. I just left her a few minutes ago and wanted to write something and share her video. It obviously touched MY HEART. I don’t know how to say enough how much I love her. It was beautiful because she knows I love videos and she made a video for me. It was amazing… She proposed to me, and I proposed back to her! I know she loves music so I sang her a song to ask her to marry me. (I’ll probably use the song in a video later)
I was starting a post about Happiness earlier today, because out of all the awesome things I’ve gotten from here, the unbelievable happiness has to be the most amazing and surprising benefit. I have absolutely never been so happy in all my life as I have recently in here. And it just seems to bet more and more intense, every day. There’s really no way to explain it or even describe the level of happiness I’ve had in here. Hopefully Taylor’s video shows some of it. I feel like no matter what happens in my life, I will always be able to come here and be happy.
Some people say it’s not real, but I have to tell you the emotions are so very real, so very intense and powerful. When you’re gazing deeply into someone’s eyes that you know and love deeply in your heart and so happy to marry them, sobbing trying to type or even just say yes, it’s real. When you’re sharing the death of a relative, and realize who in your life cares most, you’ll know it’s real. When you feel their arms around you, and smell the flowers, and laugh so hard your cheeks hurt, that’s real. It’s so real, it’s scary. No it’s not scary, it’s just so intense, so passionate, so priceless!
I love you with all my heart. I can’t wait to marry you and show the world how much I love you, and how committed I am to you. You swept me off my feet and won my heart, making it look so easy to wipe out every defense. You mean more than I can say, but I’ll spend my lifetime here showing you, loving you, pleasing you in every way.
Susan and Katy,
Thank you, thank you, thank you for all that you’ve done. YOU have made this all possible and the most amazing thing and I really mean that. YOU made this possible and every bit of love I feel for Taylor I also feel for you. You’ve made LYN mean something amazing.
I’m very conservative in real life, ok maybe even boring. I was never crazy. I go to church in real life and I’ve never even been tempted to cheat. I totally believe in exclusivity in real life marriage and even relationships. But I think no matter what you prefer in real life I think you to chalk this up as one of the things that’s different in here.
It’s not that you can’t be exclusive in IMVU relationships, you can literally be anything you want in IMVU. But it does kind of go against the grain of this crazy place. This place is like miracle grow for relationships and even if you’re not looking for anything, fish jump into your boat and pop out of nowhere. You’re not being bad. This happens to everyone and this is an issue we all have to wrestle with.
There are a lot of ways to handle this with your partner and any can work, but it’s important to talk about it. You can obviously be exclusive or open. You can have a list of acceptables or just say nobody in a group or anyone not in a group. You can allow limited touching or only go so far or just nothing without the other person present. I could give you examples of couples that worked with each of these variations. You can even have different rules for different people, because every person and every relationship is different.
The important thing is to talk about it to establish it and understand what your ground rules are with your partner. Also remember communication and love are the keys to happiness in here. And it’s a very fluid place, so what you or your partner want or need will change sometimes too.
You cant look at it like its real life. It’s not exactly a game but it’s not real either and it’s not you being bad. It’s just kind of the way this place seems to go. I guess that’s the downside of it being so easy to meet people, it’s also hard not to.
I’ve met a lot great people in here, and made some of the most amazing friends I’ve ever had in my life. But I’ve never felt such an awesome love, a sincere true friend and heart felt passion as I do for Susan and for Katy.
This world is made up of the most amazing variety of rooms and activities but it’s the people that make a room and your friends that make this so amazing. And I have the greatest honor today of announcing the re-commitment of my best friends, my twin sis, aka. my Twist, Katy, and my most loving owner Susan.
I met Susan through Katy and she has grown over time from a true friend into the the most amazing love. She pushes me and makes this place unbelievably special. They both make me want to be a better person.
So it is with the absolute greatest honor excitement and love imaginable that I announce Katy and Susan’s recommitment ceremony on November 7th at 1 am. (an election night they won’t forget). I’ve said it before but have to say it again, they are the most amazing people I’ve met in almost two years in here or anywhere and I love respect and admire them both more than I can ever say. But I will gladly be here showing them both as long as they will have me.
The idea of IMVU marriage really freaked me out when I first saw it here. That’s because I’m married in real life, and my biggest fear in here was hurting my real life marriage. So last June when Holly asked me to break this one rule (I was so nervous coming on here I had a lot of rules) I was reluctant but agreed if we used a different word. The different word idea didn’t work that well and took too much explanation. And pretty soon I just called it married like everyone else.
I don’t know exactly what the point is to this except that the word “marriage” carries so much weight and can be very difficult or even scary. I’ve been struggling with and thinking about this a lot lately. Yes I’m single again and kind of enjoying that. I’m honestly not really looking for anything else right now either, just enjoying things a little. I guess that’s really nothing new but still. Being “married” isn’t what’s going to make you happy here. Marriage really just means you give someone priority.
I think the point is don’t get hung up on the word imvu marriage. It’s just a word and in this crazy world it literally means almost anything you want it to be. There are almost as many different rules or types or marriages as there are types of relationships. I think the key thing to remember is that the only way any of us have of holding on to anyone is loving them more than anyone else does. And if you stop feeling and doing that you’re slipping.
The good news is that your imvu lover doesn’t just see your pixels when they see you. They see the sum of all the love and emotions you’ve shared. So share the heck out of them and always do your very best to make your partner feel like you love the heck out of them more than anyone else ever has! And be sensitive to their needs. Then no matter what words or title you use, you’ll never be lonely.
I usually try not to post things just to one person but rather show the lesson behind things so it’s helpful for everyone. I’ve never written to anyone outside of Imvu before either but this seemed important to say. I don’t know when he’ll see this but I had to write to write and thank Stephanie’s new RL fiancé.
I want so much to thank you. To thank you for making Stephanie so amazingly happy and for letting us share that wonderful feeling with her. You get to see people in here in a very special way from the inside out. And I’ve never met a more beautiful girl on the inside than Stephanie. She has the most amazing heart and I couldn’t possibly be more happy for you both.
We had the most special, wonderful opportunity to follow and get to know you through her, to watch and be a little bird on her shoulder, and to share all the happiness that has just poured out of her heart since she met you. We have never met but I feel like I know you and even your family more than a little, at least in an Imvu way.
We have been more than privileged to share a little bit of Stephanie’s heart and to be her secret cheerleaders. No matter what happens this will always have been one of the most special things about this crazy place and no matter what, I will be her friend till the end of days. I pray for you both and know that you are heading for truly great things.
Yes and Yes. I’m kind of weird I guess, being straight and happily married to a man in RL with three kids, and married to a the sexiest woman I’ve ever met in here. I was mostly lez when I started in here, afraid that every guy would turn into a stalker or that it would hurt my RL marriage. It also seemed that women were easier to talk to and it wasn’t centered around or focused on sex. Over the past year I’ve gone from being unwilling to friend guys to having half my sex with them, but I have to confess I don’t have the type of relationships with guys that I do with girls.
Sometimes people assume that if I’m married here that means I’m taken. Marriages here have a lot more variety than they do in real life. I feel like I have the best of both worlds cause my IMVU wife doesn’t just allow me to have fun, she pushes me like crazy, not just to have fun but to share my heart and I do. The connection with Holly is way above anything else, but it’s an amazing feeling to feel so much in love with her and have so much fun at the same time. It makes me feel even closer and so much more appreciative of her. The badder I am the more she likes it, and the more fun it is for me as she pushes me. This wouldn’t be for everyone but is so one of the reasons why I say I’m the luckiest girl in imvu.
Update July 2012: Almost a year later, we’ve downgraded, not broken up, just not really married any more. I still love Holly with all my heart and know she loves me. But her priorities have changed a little and she isn’t on that much and despite my protests, thought I needed to be free to love and be loved more. She’s still the sexiest person I’ve ever met in here. I didn’t really want it, felt safe being married sort of, though I have to admit I do like being single to some degree. I think the key is to be happy no matter where you’re at in here, and you really can be as happy as you make your mind up to be pretty much.
October 2012: This tends to be a little fluid. Holly basically left IMVU, going in other directions so I’m pretty much on my own and enjoying a lot.
Virtual marriage is a crazy concept to anyone new here. Being married in real life, I was probably more afraid of it than anyone. I made one of my rules that I can’t possibly do that. In some ways it sounds silly in such a free crazy place to want to make that type of commitment. Don’t worry we all think that. Just have a good time and play it by ear.
Just don’t be surprised if you wake up one morning and realize that is the only way to describe what you feel. About the time you realize what’s happened, you’ll also realize that it’s really not making a commitment, so much as acknowledging how you feel and the commitment you already have. That’s how this place sneaks up on you. That’s when you’ll turn around and realize how beautiful it is and that you suddenly want to do this very badly for your partner. And honestly it doesn’t have to take away any of the emotion from your real life marriage or relationships if you keep the worlds separate.
These are my wedding vows to Holly. I love her with all my heart and wanted her to know that while I am away. The pictures aren’t bad but there is one or two with a little skin in them. :-)
Is IMVU alright for married people, is a tricky and often difficult question. It’s not correct to say that every married person on imvu is cheating, but it’s also not correct to say that it’s never cheating. There are two factors you have to use to determine the appropriateness of a situation. The first is the precautions taken to limit things. Never crossing the line between IMVU and RL won’t seem like much of a big deal to single people but is critical for anyone married. You can take it a step further and not maintain any ongoing relationships with your spouse’s sex. It’s also important not to do things that reduce your desire for your spouse. If it’s adversely affecting the relationship, it’s definitely crossing the line.
The second part of the equation is how your spouse not only is affected, but will they look at it. How will your rl partner feel if they walk in at the wrong moment? Will they understand the difference and separation between real and virtual or what have they agreed to. The more communication you have there, the safe it is. Although that’s not always easy to do, and can cause issues and concerns too. You can get a divorce in most places now for any reason whatsoever. So the only answer or opinion that really counts is your spouses