Know when to shut up

shut up the emotions in imvu
Communication is important but knowing when to shut up can be just as important but can be even harder to do especially when you get excited and emotional. You don’t have to not respond. Just slow down and give yourself some time.

One great tip to do that as well as to get an extra opinion on it is to have a partner that you can bounce things off of when its important. Instead of responding to their messages, send it to your partner and talk to them before resending it. You’ll probably like their input and improve it.

The best rule is that if you’re upset never send more than three messages. If you can’t say it in three messages wait a day and rewrite it. Even if they’re just small messages more that three messages makes you look out of control and is guaranteed to only hurt you and isn’t going to get your point across.

dirty windowImvu is emotional and can be intense so you have to be careful. If you have to say something more send a gift because that shows you’re not attacking and changes the dynamic too. It has to be a loving caring gift that says you want to be a friend, and absolutely nothing with an attitude. It’s easy to just respond in kind to someone being nasty. It takes strength to stop fighting and resolve things. I’m not perfect at this for sure bug it’s important.

5 responses

  1. Sometimes no matter what you say the wrong thing and some people tend to be a little explosive at times. I upset them and tried to minimize it but they sent me 15 messages in about an hour. I wrote back three times through it and later after they left sent a message trying to summarize and undo the anger, even included a nice gift, kind of like the white rose. But the point is that no matter what you say, writing 15 messages screams so loud about you, none of the insults or things you say even matter. I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to upset or hurt you. I only wrote it here because maybe it’ll help someone else unwind the emotion and not over react. This place can be very emotional and intense in a bad way as well as a good way. Try to relax and not let things bother you so much. There’s so much good here and that will fade away after a while.

    April 22, 2014 at 3:39 am

  2. 1suzilyn

    I applaud your attempts at diffusing that persons anger….I agree that sometimes when your angry you need to step back and reevaluate….I never want to help drama continue by feeding in to it…I love the idea of a white rose as a gift….It seems to me..that id think twice if it was sent to me….id at least listen…Kait..you have such a good heart….anyone who knows you would eventually see that you have no malice or axe to grind…Im proud to be your partner….a Lyn family member….and dear friend…(lover too)…kisses, Suz

    April 24, 2014 at 11:51 am

    • The neat part is that YOU’RE the one that I went to and sent messages too when I needed to slow down and diffuse things. I’m more than PROUD to be your partner and your lover too!

      April 24, 2014 at 2:38 pm

  3. this is good advice…
    and probably something both you and i should also keep in mind sometimes.. its hard for both of us to step away in the heat of the moment..

    April 28, 2014 at 9:39 pm

  4. Both of us, I think that’s most people! That’s why I wrote this. :)

    April 29, 2014 at 1:49 pm

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