Better Safe than Sorry

imvu jail cellmateThis place can certainly be very emotional. And while I don’t have many issues or drama personally, you still have to be safe and respect that line between virtual and real life. Once you open the door it’s hard to put the tooth paste back in the tube. It’s easy to say the wrong thing or have something get taken the wrong way and offend someone. No matter how much you love someone right now, there’s a reasonable chance they won’t always love you as much. And if they feel hurt by anything, you don’t want to give anyone, even someone you love, the ability to do anything that risks your ability to be here or worse yet hurt you in real life.

If you’re open to real life potential it’s not as cut and dry as it is for me, being married in rl. If I had to worry if anyone in the activities I’m involved in connected me with my website, I could be in trouble and forced to let it go or kill it, which would kill me. It’s not a question of trusting one person or not, but if someone just thought it was cute and nice to send flowers, something simple could cause a major problem. If someone was jealous or blamed me for their son or daughter’s activity on here, just a phone call in anger could put this at risk. I don’t want to think about this too much but I had an issue at one point from my husband about yahoo messages that he saw on my cell phone. I immediately deleted the app from my iphone to prove it wasn’t anything. That’s the closest I’ve come to having to leave but it scared me. I am addicted and I admit it, which is why I try not to risk things.

chained in loveNobody’s worth risking everything here for. I walk away from people who don’t understand that, and are asking for pictures or video cam. (especially guys because they feel much more stalker-like when they say it) But please don’t take my concern to mean I don’t love you or feel close. It’s the opposite actually, its because I do care about people here very much. I want to be able to share the things that matter, but no matter what bump or issue we have I won’t mess with that or your life. Also because of the website and my name, I also can’t really change my avi name or prevent people from accessing my website very easily. So if this is an issue with you I’m sorry, but I don’t want to risk this for anyone.

5 responses

  1. wow.. i was just explaining this to someone. thank you for putting it so eloquently.
    I have had exactly the same experience with the yahoo mail app and for a while i felt the room spin hoping he wouldn’t investigate too much (thankfully he didn’t). though incidentally, the new version makes it much easier to log out. and yes, i have also had worse scares…

    June 14, 2013 at 10:29 pm

  2. collette

    I too have had a few times where someone wanted to cross the line into real. I have seen many things here and nothing has ever scared me, or really creeped me out except for that! What makes this world so unique is that you can be or do anything you wish. You can even wish for something and it has a good likelihood to come true. Keeping this separate from real is what makes it so magical. Many of the things I say or do here I could could never do in real, even with my closest rl friends. Why would I ever want to change that? I am married in real and I would never dream of hurting my spouse. I also respect my marriage in real and if something happened that compromised that I would have to make my final sign off here. Something inside of me would die if I had to do that. Maybe it is more acceptable for single users? Maybe some users have not been able to experience the pure connection that is so beautiful and I think can only happen here? But I do know this, it is much easier to just un-friend and block someone than to get a restraining order! I do not want to come home some day and find one of my kids pets boiling in a pot on the stove! -lol- (what movie was that?) Katie, I too want to thank you for this article, (wish I had your writing skills) cause now if someone wants to try and cross that bridge again I can just direct them to here! Simple!

    June 16, 2013 at 8:58 am

  3. I too have had a few times where someone wanted to cross the line into real. I have seen many things here and nothing has ever scared me, or really creeped me out except for that! What makes this world so unique is that you can be or do anything you wish. You can even wish for something and it has a good likelihood to come true. Keeping this separate from real is what makes it so magical. Many of the things I say or do here I could could never do in real, even with my closest rl friends. Why would I ever want to change that? I am married in real and I would never dream of hurting my spouse. I also respect my marriage in real and if something happened that compromised that I would have to make my final sign off here. Something inside of me would die if I had to do that. Maybe it is more acceptable for single users? Maybe some users have not been able to experience the pure connection that is so beautiful and I think can only happen here? But I do know this, it is much easier to just un-friend and block someone than to get a restraining order! I do not want to come home some day and find one of my kids pets boiling in a pot on the stove! -lol- (what movie was that?) Katie, I too want to thank you for this article, (wish I had your writing skills) cause now if someone wants to try and cross that bridge again I can just direct them to here! Simple!

    June 16, 2013 at 9:01 am

  4. Adding my tuppence’s worth of IMVU wisdom, I can only say this… I have NEVER shared pictures or used a webcam, because there’s no need for that. There are other sites on which one can chat with all the whistles and bells we don’t have on IMVU, and usually they are more “compromising”.

    May 8, 2014 at 3:58 am

    • Yes, good point, there are plenty of places you can do that, you don’t need to here and shouldn’t compromise the freedom you have here for that.

      May 8, 2014 at 1:37 pm

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