Exclusivity in IMVU

an example of a great relationshipI’m very conservative in real life, ok maybe even boring. I was never crazy. I go to church in real life and I’ve never even been tempted to cheat. I totally believe in exclusivity in real life marriage and even relationships. But I think no matter what you prefer in real life I think you to chalk this up as one of the things that’s different in here.

It’s not that you can’t be exclusive in IMVU relationships, you can literally be anything you want in IMVU. But it does kind of go against the grain of this crazy place. This place is like miracle grow for relationships and even if you’re not looking for anything, fish jump into your boat and pop out of nowhere. You’re not being bad. This happens to everyone and this is an issue we all have to wrestle with.

There are a lot of ways to handle this with your partner and any can work, but it’s important to talk about it. You can obviously be exclusive or open. You can have a list of acceptables or just say nobody in a group or anyone not in a group. You can allow limited touching or only go so far or just nothing without the other person present. powerful imvu relationships I could give you examples of couples that worked with each of these variations. You can even have different rules for different people, because every person and every relationship is different.

The important thing is to talk about it to establish it and understand what your ground rules are with your partner. Also remember communication and love are the keys to happiness in here. And it’s a very fluid place, so what you or your partner want or need will change sometimes too.

You cant look at it like its real life. It’s not exactly a game but it’s not real either and it’s not you being bad. It’s just kind of the way this place seems to go. I guess that’s the downside of it being so easy to meet people, it’s also hard not to.

4 responses

  1. Yea, these are all things that are unfortunately easy to say but maybe hard to fully learn. I think maybe all of us have to learn some of these lessons the hard way but hopefully these posts will help speed up the process.

    December 20, 2012 at 11:04 pm

  2. collettelilac

    When I first came into IMVU I met someone who wanted a relationship right away. I did not know anything about imvu yet or relationships. I did fall in love and we had a relationship. She was very jealous which I thought was cute at the time. What it did though was totally limit my new friendships on here. She would read my messages and read things into them that were not there. She actually would message people who messaged me and ask them if we were in relationships! This totally freaked me out. My gut was telling me that this is not what relationships should be like on here but I did not know any better at the time. Also, she was rarely on and I would go to rooms or meet people and not want to go anywhere with them cause I was in a “relationship.” I did not know any ground rules at all.
    Then it turns out that the person I was in this relationship with met someone else and dumped me! lol So after all that and all the wasted time on here and a broken heart and not meeting real friends like I have now could have been thwarted if I had seen this post earlier!
    Actually I just wanted to tell Kaitlyn how cute her rear looks in the yellow panties on the first pic on the post!! Giggles!!!

    December 27, 2012 at 6:47 pm

    • Jealousy in imvu is the definitely most damaging thing. That is the worst situation for exclusivity. It sounds like the other person didn’t know any more about relationships than you did. If you love someone you want them to be happy. If you can’t be on that much you have to understand and should absolutely never expect someone else to come on and go to disney world but not ride any of the rides. Yes it’s fun to ride them together but just because you ride some rides with someone else doesn’t mean you want to see them any less. Giving someone freedom or even encouraging them to have fun makes them love you more when you’re there. Being exclusive with different schedules and different amounts of imvu time is a recipe for disaster. In my mind exclusivity should only be attempted by a couple headed for or in a real life relationship together.

      When you’re new it’s nice to get into a relationship with someone more experienced to learn the ropes and meet people through them. But I’ve seen a pattern that I couldn’t say is 100% the case, but everyone I’ve really talked to and watched has better and better relationships over time in here. So even that the first one is great future ones will probably only be better.

      December 27, 2012 at 6:55 pm

  3. Pingback: Why exclusivity Is hard in IMVU | Kaitlyn's IMVU Tips

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