Is it possible to take RP too seriously?

imvu role playingI really enjoy the creativity and descriptiveness of a real good T1 style role play. It can be very exciting in story or fight. But like anything I guess, there are some people that will take it too far. A long flourishing response is great when you’re doing something entertaining in a room, but I have to say in passion, real passion, you need a back and forth flow. To wait three minutes and then post a paragraph that the other person has to read carefully takes away from the real flow of emotion. Just like we speak and behave differently in a group or normal conversation than we do in bed with a partner, I think it’s important to adjust a little.

I add ~ in front of actions and ( ) around side notes in regular conversation because I think it makes it easier to read and feel, but when things switch into passion mode, I tend to lose the ~s and just let it flow in passion. I think the growing passion comes across better in more frequent shorter responses. I don’t mean to hog or control the session, I have just learned to let it flow and try to express that. I love creativity and descriptive adjectives, but I guess that part of my mind just shuts down when I am just screaming Fuck Me. ~blushing with my hand over my face~

I was with someone the other night and they made a comment about me not giving them a chance, which I like actually because so many people (yes mostly guys) tend to seem to lose their ability to type all together at that point. Anyway I tried to shut up but if I’m honestly enjoying it, oh I should just shut up here. The point is expressing yourself makes it more sexy, but don’t try to “role play” too much when you’re in the heat of the moment.

And whatever you do, never put your role play above the people that love you. PrincessRinaDhampir (who was one of my best friends even listed on the website for a long time since she was MaceDNDarkness), just did that walking away from her wife of over a year, Cyndia (ok I’ll call it what it was, dumping her wife) because of her role play. Then she had the gall to blame her wife trying to twist it and acting like it was her wife’s fault. I understand it’s natural to blame the other person to some degree but putting your role playing above the people that love and stand by you, is just wrong and make not only you but your whole Dhampir family and your vampire role play (which I usually like) look bad in my humble opinion.

13 responses

  1. dirtyroleplaygirl

    You go girl!!! I love when Kait gets fired up and comes out swinging. Always standing up for her friends. Gotta love it

    September 26, 2012 at 7:41 pm

  2. .. i dunno.. i still worrry about taking sides without knowing all the details. i prefer offering my love and support to all sides… but that’s probably just me.

    September 26, 2012 at 8:30 pm

    • You know me though, I tried first to smooth it out and stay a friend. She didn’t know that I read the full conversation and knew what she said. There’s usually some responsibility on both sides I agree. In this case I was very close and it was unfortunately very clear. It always hurts to lose a friend who had your picture in her profile for almost 6 months, and hurts even more to have to point out how she was wrong and threw away her marriage on purpose because of her role play and new family.

      September 26, 2012 at 8:40 pm

  3. This was very hard because Macey (recently changed to Rhina) was one of my closest friends. I honestly don’t wish her or anyone any harm. I wasn’t even going to include her name till she not only said I could but practically dared me to. I usually write about mistakes I make along the way in IMVU but in this case it was her mistake and essentially just getting her priorities out of whack, which happens sometimes.

    The point is that Role Playing is fun, I’m a big fan of Role Playing as you can see by the section of that name in here. But putting that ahead of people who love you and you married (a role play she chose to ignore) is wrong. The role play isn’t real, the emotions and love you share, is. Or was.

    September 26, 2012 at 8:35 pm

  4. oh i agree i’m sorry kait. i meant to add that I also agree completely with S-, that the passion you have toward protecting and defending your friends is one of the things love most about you. and of course you know more of the story than me…

    i guess, it is my deepest belief (also from lots of studies) that so much depends on people’s circumstances, and often times there are circumstances that we don’t see…

    September 26, 2012 at 8:46 pm

  5. You are such an angel always Katy. I try to be but I do fight back a little when someone does something like this to my friend, even if it’s a former friend doing it. :(

    September 26, 2012 at 8:51 pm

  6. on your other point though, about shorter versus longer sentences. you know me, i’m a big fan of shorter. I think also shorter sentences are really good at conveying the very real feeling of breathlessness, and the swept awayness i so often feel. breaking sentences in half or into words, works really well. but i respect other styles. a mutual friend who’s name begins and ends with j, is really good at using complete sentences. Not T1 style paragraphs, but still fairly carefully constructed sentences. i think part of the trick of being a good partner though is being adaptable to other styles. something i try hard to do with someone who prefers fewer but longer sentences is to not to let things get away from the other person. something I guess from an improve exercise in an acting class i did once (i was an awful actress but i did learn something). your choices should give options to the other person, not take them away. so if i see someone is more of a slower updater, i will make sure things i write won’t get in the way of whatever he might be trying to do. talking about how i feel, how i breathe… stuf like that.

    September 26, 2012 at 8:52 pm

    • Yes, I kind of learned some of the shorter responses from you. I love it and love the reality feeling it gives. But you’re right it’s good to match your partner for sure. I did try in that conversation, well because he said something about it. *giggles* I’m certainly not the expert at this, though I usually get good reviews :)

      September 26, 2012 at 8:54 pm

  7. ~giggles~ and i guess i learned the power of short from Tom Clancy that was a guilty pleasure of mine back in junior high. i was a sucker for his writing style that always kept you on the edge of your seat.

    September 26, 2012 at 9:25 pm

  8. I got an invite out of the blue recently from Rina. I went and was polite but she’s still angry and bitter. She claims what I wrote was wrong but declined to even say how. She’s more than welcome to post anything here. We exchanged messages but she seemed to be only escalating so I sent her the following note, trying to love her and help get past this. In response she’s talking to my friends about it. Should I go talking to her friends about an issue with her? Is that appropriate? If I think she’s hurting my relationships should I respond? I’m the happiest friendly person but when you mess with my relationships it’s like messing with my children.

    A faint glow appears in the room as a fairy floats through the open window landing softly in front of the large sleeping figure. Leaning down and kissing you softly on the cheek as a chime dings somewhere in the distance. She smiles watching you sleep, your chest steadily rising and falling slowly. She closes her eyes and clasps her hands whispering silent prayers for the dark figure in front of her and the girl behind it. A tear slowly forms slipping down her cheek, before being brushed aside with a finger. It turns to sparkles in her hand which she sprinkles on the bed before she turns suddenly leaping silently across the room and sailing effortlessly back through the window floating into the night sky with a soft giggle. No amount of back and forth words can solve or fix some things. You were and are a wonderful person no matter what and that’s all that matters now. You wake feeling refreshed and content with the sweetest dreams still fading, the whole world seems somehow just a tiny be happier.

    Anyway, this was the note I wrote trying to get past it and move on. I’m including that because I’m trying to resolve this by loving her. Now it’s her turn to reply if she has any issue or wants to correct the record the floor is hers.

    October 26, 2012 at 4:26 pm

  9. Kait, you are like a golden retriever, friendly, loving everybody and fiercely loyal, those are the things I love most about you. But sometimes too much like an eager puppy, attacking quickly and fiercely, out of love and all the best intentions, but maybe too quickly. Just to clarify, she wasn’t trying to bring me into this, she was trying to keep me out of this. I butted my way in because I wanted to help. I still do. I still believe communication and love conquers all. I hope I didn’t make things worse.

    October 26, 2012 at 5:03 pm

  10. But Katy I WAS communicating. I accepted her chat and wasn’t hostile at all. I tried to understand what she thought I had wrong though she wouldn’t say and still won’t. She claims I don’t have the facts yet she won’t give me any. She’s just whining and causing drama over old news. I still think what she did to Cyndia was wrong but I tried to get past it and just be loving in response to her anger. Rina didn’t just give me permission to include her name, she then demanded it and then sent a message daring me to on top of that. The bottom line is that this is OLD NEWS and I don’t care how you soften it, talking to my best friend about it and causing drama a month later after everyone else has moved on is wrong.

    I know you trust everyone and go way beyond just giving them the benefit of the doubt but I just can’t say I think she’s causing drama here by accident. She’s angry and wants to create issues that don’t exist and drag people that aren’t involved into it. That’s what people do when they know they’re wrong and just want to hurt someone. I did unfriend her now because she’s obviously not a friend and I’m very sorry her anger is spilling over to other people. Rina, grow up and get over it, and move on. Whether dumping your wife who loved you was justified or not, bringing it up over and over again with people who aren’t involved at all is wrong and is only making it worse for YOU most of all.

    October 26, 2012 at 5:21 pm

  11. Anonymous

    My name is Myrina and I was the Macey that Kait mentions in her column above. It was years ago now that she wrote that and she was absolutely and totally right in that I took rp too seriously and lost in the process the best person that was ever in my life. I could not see it clearly then but I do now and I totally regret my actions back then. There is no reason to forgive me but I did want to set the record straight in that I was incredibly wrong.

    November 17, 2017 at 2:27 pm

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