IMVU is an insane place that’s all about chatting, dancing, meeting new people, beautiful sexy cartoons, shopping, sexy clothes, strip clubs, sexy poses and parties of every description, and of course lots of sex, all in a reasonably safe virtual way. The real secret that some people never figure out or that at least takes a long time to figure out, is that under all that, imvu is really about relationships. The variety of relationships in IMVU is as vast and diverse as the two million people from over 80 countries.
Virtual relationships here can also be amazingly powerful and develop much faster here in this crazy world than in real life, without all of the distractions and nuisances of real life. Unfortunately I couldn’t find any frank real world advice about IMVU or virtual relationships. So after talking about that long enough I decided it was time to try to put something helpful for the IMVU community together. I don’t work for IMVU or even know anyone that does. I just Love IMVU, and this is just one crazy MILF’s random collection of thoughts and experiences in here. I like taking pictures and making videos of IMVU and try to keep most of the more adult things in a Private Section with passwords, but there are a lot of Imvu Girls here and many of the images are pretty sexy and geared toward an adult audience.
I hope you enjoy it and I’d love to hear your comments or feedback. IMVU User Name: Kaitlyn (send a message before Adding me as a Friend)
Have you had the type of intense passion that just blows you away? You feel like your whole heart just exploded and you can’t think about anything else and even long after you’ve left, just tingle still lost in that love. How does that happen? It takes some getting used to and time here to really put yourself into your avi, and to learn to open up, to lower your walls and ultimately to open your heart and totally give it away. You also have to find the right person that you fit with and that’s done all those things, put themselves into their avi, opened up and truly totally loves you back, the flow can be amazing.
I think of it like a fight, where you push your partner’s buttons, and they push yours, and you scream louder and louder, each pushing and escalating, until it spirals totally out of control, but in a good way. You both explode and feel the earth shake! And the amazing thing is that a relationship is the accumulation of the emotion you’ve shared and sharing like this definitely adds up. I wrote recently about being sluttified, because as soon as I see my love, I feel that passion aching to get out, pulling me even if we’re just hanging out and talking. It’s always there, waiting, craving.
Even more excitingly, just like sometimes a relationship gets into a fighting rut, and you tend to fall into the same posture and fight over and over again more and more easily, the same thing happens here in love and passion here. You fall right back into it, opening up, pushing their buttons and getting yours pushed, escalating more and more intensely until you can’t stop it. It’s fun to change things, to change poses, and situations, but you can get seriously addicted to the passion.
I worry a little about how this would have affected me when I was younger. The intensity of IMVU is almost dangerous in some ways, and it’s also what makes it hurt soo terribly when it falls apart too. But it’s the most amazing rollercoaster of emotion you’ll ever find. I don’t know how to find words for it really. Songs tend to describe it better than words to me and I love my music in here.
I feel like the luckiest person in the IMVU world, having a decent life and good family, and being able to have the most amazing fantasy at the same time. I guess I’ve probably said this in a lot of posts, especially lately because I’m feeling it so much. Put yourself into it, open your heart and learn to let it flow and you’ll have more fun, more love and more passion than you can probably even imagine. Find the right person, someone on the same page with you in terms of their time and likes here; someone that has done those things too and share this amazing ride together, day by day.
A lot of things in here are very similar to how they are in real life but a few things are very different. One big difference is the morality. It took a while to understand this. I’m very conservative in real life and my first inclination was to be the same way in here.
What I learned over time though is that in here being physical is very different. Sure it doesn’t have the physical consequences as real life contact. But it’s more than that. I guess it’s partially because its not real, partially because that’s part of the spirit and purpose of the place, but its essentially the currency and way you interact and communicate in here.
In real life it’s bad to be looked at as a slut but in here being called a slut is almost a good thing kind of saying someone is open and loving and fun to be with. It’s not a derogatory term at all in here. That’s why I’m proud say I’ve been “SLUTIFIED!”
Great friendships and relationships
Playing video games
Falling in love
Travel and adventure
Having a thrown
All the sex you could want
Living out exciting fantasies
All the material things you could want
Listening to your fav music
D. All of the above!
When you think about it, IMVU really is all of these things and more, so it’s easy to understand why it can be so addictive. Of course your actual mileage may vary, but even if you don’t feel all of this right now, it’s exciting to think that you’re doing something that really can be all of these things.
This was just a quick list off the top of my head. What is this place to you? What other things do you find in this crazy place that you would add to this list?
Leave a comment, even if you’re new or want it to be annonomus. There’s no wrong answer! Just tell us what makes you happy.
I recently published the 500th post, and then this weekend got really sick, in bed for two days with a fever, and bad congestion and coughing. It wasn’t fun. I watched more tv, but I also thought about what would happen if… well if I had to leave. Even though I worry less about that now after a couple years, I could be just one big blowout argument away from having to walk away from this.
I’m not totally sure I could even do it actually, but if push came to shove, it’s always possible. I’m not saying this to worry anyone because that’s not imminent or even likely that I can see. But I wanted to say one thing publicly that needs to be said just so it’s clear. If anything happens that I can’t continue here, the blog ImvuTips.com goes to my twin Katy.
Things have been really amazing lately and I’m sorry if I’ve been a little caught up in things at times and don’t put enough of you on it. You really are my twin and more important than I can possibly say. IMVU is constantly evolving and changing, people coming and going. It’s not that your relationship isn’t a success if you’re not still together five years or twenty five years later. It’s a success if you felt that uplifting, whole heart loving feeling.
Anyway I don’t mean to get side tracked, I just want to say publicly that Katy is not only the most amazing person I’ve ever met on here, but maybe the most amazing person I’ve ever met ANYWHERE. I could probably make this whole blog about you and not say it enough, how much you mean to me, how big of an honor it is to be your Twin and your framily.
IMVU is ultimately about Relationships and being able to connect with people. And that’s hard to capture in words, but I want to share one of the most special moments I’ve had here. I think you’ll see why I say that. I didn’t make this for the website I made it for Stephanie, to keep on her cell phone and inspire her and be there for her for years to come. But I couldn’t not share this too.
There’s honestly no other way to say how special she is to me and how much this connection means. I’m sincerely honored to have several very special connections, with the most amazing people, each totally unique and more wonderful than I can say. Hopefully you can feel some of the heart and love in this and that you get to feel some of this magic too.
To Stephanie (and Wendy!!!) I love you more than I can ever say or show you, and being able to share this with you has truly been one of the most magic and special things of not just imvu but my whole life. Ik hou van jullie beide zo veel Stephanie and Wendy!
I’ve had a lot of amazing times here in IMVU, but last night was the most amazing nights of my life here! It was my four month anniversary with Kris and I knew she was doing something special for that, but she surprised me by asking me to marry her. It was soo magical, Fairy Flying, unbelievable flowers and the most romantic cuddles. I’ve never felt so close, so loved, and so unbelievably wonderful and so blessed.
Kris is not only the most loving, passionate person I think I’ve ever know, but she’s an awesome designer and developer and truly fun person and friend. Kris fits in with my family and friends even better than I do and is always such a blessing. She’s everything I could ever want. I Love you with all my heart Kris, and am sooo sooo glad to be able to tell the world how much you mean to me.
You’ve made the past four months since we met mind blowingly amazing. A picture’s worth a thousand words so I spent most of the day yesterday going back through thousands and thousands of pictures (is that the equivalent of millions of words) from just the past four months to pull out some of the most interesting or memorable pictures. I tried to keep this one mostly clean, (although it’s probably rated R), but I wanted to try and show people a little of the love and Our Story.
The 24the of March, a day we both can’t forget…at 12 “o” clock, midnight hour my time, is a moment for us to share. At this moment, at this day we both are hopeless sweet devoted at each other!
Some people will think we both been crazy, two years in love at a world of IMVU! But we both know, we ain’t nuts, we ain’t crazy and we ain’t being in love with just an AVI of some kind of virtual world. It’s the person of who we love, the person behind the AVI, and this person means so much more for the both of us.
Steph, I love you…or how we would say in Dutch “Steph, ik hou van jou!”, I love you till our hair getting grey or till our faces will be fully filled of lines to betray our age…giggles.
I still remembering the first day we’ve met,
we’re both too shy to say much at all,
It is funny to think back at that moment,
because now we both having a ball!
They say, true friendship and love is rare,
an adage that I believe to be true,
to have a special bond is something that I cherish,
I am so lucky Steph, to have met you.
Our friendship is something really special,
It is something unique in his own way,
we have something irreplaceable,
oh Steph, I love you more and more each day.
Friends are forever and ever,
especially the bond that you and I possess,
I so love your fun-filled personality,
You’ll never fail for me to impress.
The world could use more people like you,
it would certainly be a much better place,
I love everything and all about you,
you are someone to me I could never replace.
You are everything to me Steph, more and more,
I could never express this at you enough,
life is such a treacherous journey,
without you, my days would be even more tough.
My darling, you are so special to me,
and hope you will know I will love you until the end,
I will always be there for you Steph,
you will always be my forever love and my very best friend…xxx
My son had a book to read yesterday (How Full is Your Bucket, by Tom Rath and Mary Reckmeyer, video below), that was so neat I kind of wanted to just retype the whole thing for the site. It’s not about IMVU of course but it definitely applies a lot. I guess a lot of life principles apply here. It’s just easier to see things in here sometimes.
The point of the book was that we all have a bucket that we use for our good feelings. And we are either filling each others buckets or we are emptying their bucket. We can’t fill our own buckets but we can fill other people’s buckets. If we always fill the buckets of the people around us, we will get our own bucket filled in the process. And taking something out of someone else’s bucket does NOT add it to ours.
It was cute but it made me think of here for some reason. When we start here we think its just a fun sexy game or something. But along the way as we start to connect with our avi and connect with friends we learn to let our walls down and our heart out and it almost takes on a life of its own. And the principle we kind of know for life seem to work even more clearly in this clutter free virtual world.
So even though you can do or be anything you want in imvu, you’ll probably find that being a better version of yourself is much more rewarding . I don’t mean better in terms of morals but I mean better in how you treat others. Karma definitely applies here and in the end whatever you give out is what you’ll get back.
Love everyone with all your heart. Don’t play games, just fill buckets and you’ll soon find that your own bucket is more than overflowing. One of the neat things I think I’ve learned here is to just pour out love and share easily. Sure, pixels are initially attractive, but what really makes you attractive in IMVU his your heart. As long as you keep filling buckets and sharing with the people around you will be loved and have the time of your life in imvu!
Poly-Amorism means loving many. In our real lives everything works better and last longer and goes smoother when you have just one great love. But wait, that’s not true either. We all have lots of relationships and people that love us and we love in real life too. Some of them are mothers and sisters and relatives, coworkers or friends from church or your neighborhood… the list goes on. The key thing that you have to realize is that since you’re not actually having physical contact the consequences and seriousness of it aren’t the same in here and that’s part of the environment here more so than real life.
This is one of the major differences though with IMVU. First of all you don’t have the physical downside of multiple relationships. In real life it creates a health hazard and puts everyone at risk not to mention pregnancy, but here that isn’t a factor. Secondly, it’s geared towards anonymity and privacy so it’s very easy to see someone privately and confidentially, and to meet sexy strangers very easily too.
Those are both some of the reasons why multiple relationships here is not bad, but that doesn’t explain exactly why it’s so good and so prevalent here either. I think the very nature of this place is that it’s ultimately not real and isn’t designed to be a lifetime situation. It’s kind of like living in match.com or going to an adult Disney World and limiting yourself to just one ride.
Unlike real life where the goal is usually to build a long term if not lifetime relationship and commitment, in here people come here for the journey or for the moment, to feel that once in a life time magical passion of new love over and over again. This is their fantasy and many people’s idea of a fantasy is not necessarily a single monogamous thing. Don’t get me wrong, some people definitely do that but given different schedules and life situations, unlike real life, monogamy seems to go against the grain of IMVU.
It’s not you, and it’s important to realize that your actions here do not translate into real life attitudes. Enjoy the magic of IMVU and enjoy the powerful passion that seems to fill this fantasy world.
There’s a commercial out now for the iPad that I really love. It’s Robin Williams reading a verse about the meaning of life. It talks about law and medicine being nobel pursuits that are necessary for life, but what really counts is your passion. It equates life and all of society to a powerful poem that we all get to add our verse to. And it ends with a simple question. What will your verse be???
We don’t read and write poetry because it’s cute. We read and write poetry because we are members of the human race. And the human race is filled with passion. And medicine, law, business, engineering, these are noble pursuits and necessary to sustain life. But poetry, beauty, romance, love, these are what we stay alive for. To quote from Whitman, “O me! O life!… of the questions of these recurring; of the endless trains of the faithless… of cities filled with the foolish; what good amid these, O me, O life?” Answer. That you are here – that life exists, and identity; that the powerful play goes on and you may contribute a verse. That the powerful play goes on and you may contribute a verse. What will your verse be?
I think of IMVU as my passion and this as my verse and that’s why I try hard to do it right, to uplift everyone I can, and love with abandon. I let go and throw my heart into this and share my verse here. I work hard in life to survive but in some ways this may be my real verse.
Regardless of what your real life is of isn’t you have a unique and special verse to contribute and share here if you want to. Make it count and make a good one because in the end I think what we do here does matter and does count! Life isn’t just getting from point A to point B. Share your passion and make your life a beautiful contribution, and enjoy the journey!
If you stop to think about it, what we do here is really weird. I’ve talked in the past about how our brain is an excellent simulator of things we see, and imvu allows us to live out our fantasies. But let’s face it, a lot of what we do here is sex. And a lot of what we do here is form really tight relationships we call sister, sub, wife, gf, fiancee, etc… When the world is so vast and we could live out so many things, from being an astronaut, to fighting dragons, to dancing the nutcracker ballet, why does imvu seem focused on sex and marriage?
I unlocked a part of this puzzle this week talking to a friend who doesn’t orgasm during cyber sex, and therefore doesn’t see the big deal about imvu relationships. Because thinking about it, these two are linked.
Research shows that when women orgasm, they release many hormones, amongst them oxytocin. Oxytocin is the hormone associated with bonding and trust. It is the hormone that helps mothers bond with children. Making someone inhale this hormone can make them trust you. Men release oxytocin too when they orgasm, but less and only when it is with someone they love. For women, as I was warned by a former biology teacher, orgasms start you on the dangerous path to love.
And that help explains the hold imvu has over us. The sex is addicting not just because it is fun but because of the emotional ties it holds over us.
Until next time dear reader…
Your oxytocin addled imvu scientist, signing off